The Comic Tragedy Otherwise Known as In Love With The Idea of Being In Love


**It’s been a minute since I’ve written such a post. But I need to have my moment so let me be great got dammit**

It’s almost  like watching a cross between the drama of Jersey Shore and a Shakespearean tragedy. You know, where all the characters fight each other in the streets before  slitting their wrists in love-sick grief, their last words sonnets as they fade away into death *fin*.

It’s a common story I titled In Love With The Idea Of Being In Love and too many people play the main character. It’s a comic tragedy. Comic because the concept is so utterly foolish. Tragic because so many stake their entire existence on this notion. The shit is just sad, at least in my opinion it is.

I will generalize and say that it’s mostly women that invest in this, though I’ve known a few simps men to buy stock as well. It stems from a combination of hang-ups. Insecurity, a lack of clarity, ego, preconceived notions, and a fixation on how things should be (no matter how unrealistic they may be). People will romanticize love and committed relationships to the point where they get caught up in a fantasy. Carry the fantasy long enough and it will eventually influence how you handle your relationships. At that point it’s about your ego and your fantasy,  not the other person you may (or may not) be in a relationship with. It’s a very dangerous situation to be in because, at the end of the day, nothing about what you are doing is grounded in reality. You’re living inside your head. Seeing your dream man/woman in everyone. You are not in love with the individual, you are in love with the idea of them. The relationship itself is not important but rather the idea of the relationship. Regardless of how good or bad things are it doesn’t matter because being in a relationship is all that matters.

What makes this such a tragedy is when people spend so much time chasing a fantasy that they miss out on what’s right in front of them. They dismiss potentially good people or will rush and jump into a relationship with someone they hardly took the time to get to know,  then wonder why they find themselves in the middle of a massive train wreck–of their creation.

The only real advice I can give is to let go of the fantasy of being in love. It’s a lame way to go about life. I’m not saying that there is no such thing as love, or wonderful romantic relationships but we have to work to cultivate such relationships in our daily life. Not grasp onto what we create in our heads in the hopes that it will materialize.

Besides, the real thing is always much better than the fantasy…


2 thoughts on “The Comic Tragedy Otherwise Known as In Love With The Idea of Being In Love

  1. A comic tragedy indeed.

    It’s interesting that the connection that you feel with “another” can be so real that it hits something in our conditioned wiring that starts firing projections that make that connection … surreal. A blend between fantasy and reality. Amazing how the fantasy aspect of it gets more play.

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