The Accidental Date


I’m not very big on the expose’s, especially when it comes to detailing specifics about my life. However I find myself wanting to reflect on my dating experiences. Only because I’m starting to understand that much of the self discovery process of my journey has a lot to do with how I interact and respond to others.

Last night I randomly found myself having dinner in a small intimate Thai restaurant nicely hidden on the north side of Las Vegas. As I indulged in some of the best duck curry I’ve ever tasted I found myself thoroughly enjoying the company of the person sitting across from me. How I found myself to be there, I had no idea. I even snuck a quick text to my home girl as my company left to go to the bathroom.

“OMG! This is a forealz date!”

Yeah I am that clueless and lame.

I call it the accidental date because when I initially reached out my intention was not to “holla”. I simply wanted to get to know this person.  I’m always excited to meet a fellow Buddhist, especially an African-American one. So that was the first thing that connected us. There are other things too. Us both being members of a fraternal organization is another commonality. I can relate to them, as I know how it feels to be stranger in a new town with no immediate family or close friends. I figured it would be nice to offer the opportunity to get out the house and meet people. We have a lot of common interests as well.  So when I let them know I was open to hanging out within a couple of days I found myself on what turned out to be a date.

And I realized I was enjoying that date. Not in the sense that I was hoping for more than what it is but in the sense that I was laughing and smiling and truly interested in learning more about the person sitting across from me. That  whether we hugged and went our separate ways after the check was paid or went back to their condo and banged each other’s brains out, it didn’t matter. Neither one of us was pressed either way because we were enjoying what it was, in that moment.

What I took from this experience is that those are the kinds of moments I need. The one’s where I’m not being reminded of the past or worrying about the future but where I’m fully in the present moment. Those are moments one can truly appreciate because they are so  simple. Without pressure or expectations. They are life’s little pleasant surprise.


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